BadAssMama vs. The Furious Fives

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The Terrible Twos were not so terrible at BadAssMama Central. The Tumultuous Threes - a bit more taxing. The WTF Fours speak for themselves.

But NOTHING could prepare me for the Furious Fives.

Maybe it's just my kid, but let me tell you, the tantrums coming out of my five-year-old make me want to drown myself at the bottom of a wine bottle on a daily basis. The come on so unexpectedly, so vehemently that they threaten to knock me off my feet (if accompanied by the occasional shove or swift kick in the shin, they may do so literally). And they are completely unpredictable. What sets him off one day goes over without a hitch the next. An activity that always went smoothly in the past may spontaneously erupt into World War III.

The tantrums seem to center around getting his way. All. The.Time. In matters big or small, consequential or not - if the big boy does not get his way (or has the sneaking suspicion that he is not GOING to get his way) all hell breaks loose.

It's one thing if it only happened at home, but this behavior is starting to seep into preschool as well. He's been sent out of music class every day for the past week. Sometimes his behavior is so distracting that the teachers have to send him downstairs to the equivalent of the principal's office to calm down. When I first heard about this, I was mortified. It took everything in me to not burst into tears in front of his teachers. I made it to the car, then cried all the way to work.

After I took some time to think about it, I realized that part of my reaction was sadness that my son was being sent out of class for bad behavior - that he was missing out on prime learning time, or losing privileges due to his tantrums. But when I was really honest with myself, I realized that a big chunk of it was actually embarrassment. I was ashamed that my son was becoming "that kid" in class. I felt like it reflected badly upon my skills as a parent. That I was a failure for having a five-year-old who still threw crazy temper tantrums.

After coming to this realization, I decided stop worrying about anyone else's opinion or judgement. True, I want my kid to be able to learn and behave properly in class, and I certainly don't want him to prevent other kids from learning - but I wasn't going to beat him into submission to insure that he pulled it together in the last 25 days of preschool. It didn't take a month for this issue to start, so it's going to take time to work through it. My goal is to have this thing under control before kindergarten starts in the fall.

It's 8:06pm. He's been losing his shit since roughly 7:15. Wish me luck...
PennyBroome said...

I, too, have 'that kid' and he just turned 7. He's in 1st grade. We've had in school suspension, sent home from school suspension, and all kinds of notes sent home. I have absolutely no advice for ya, sister. But I'm right there with you. Good luck.

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