Confessions of a BadAssMama - The Control Freak Edition

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Being a good parent is hard. Being a control freak and trying to be a good parent is damn-near impossible.

Let me explain.

The longer I'm in this mommy-business, the more I realize that raising children is an exercise in patience, restraint and learning to let go. While I've become rather adept at this approach as a manager in my professional life (letting my team make mistakes in a controlled environment is the best way to teach, you can get more done through delegation than trying to do it all yourself, great ideas can come from every member of the team), it just seems SO MUCH HARDER when it comes to raising my kids. Not to mention the fact that while 98% of the people I work with are relatively mature and somewhat sane, my children are tiny lunatics hell-bent on driving ME crazy.

I really think it breaks down to an issue of control. We all want the best for our children. We want to help them grow up to be the best version of themselves possible, to provide them with the best educational and enrichment opportunities to prepare them for whatever adventure they choose to pursue after their 18th birthday.

My problem is I want them to do it when I want, how I want it done and as soon as I tell them to do it.

While my employees have the incentive of a paycheck, benefits and bonus potential to keep them on the straight-and-narrow (not to mention the fact that I am the best manager in the universe....and humble to boot), my kids didn't seem to get the memo that mommy is the boss. On a weekly basis, Victor actually attempts to convince me that HE is the boss (and oftentimes I fear that he might be right). Like mommy (and daddy), our kids have their own concept of what they want for their lives. And, unlike most adults, young children have little-to-no sense of self control, delayed gratification or empathy for the greater good. They want what they want, when they want it.

So, at BadAssMama Central that basically means you have a control-freak mommy attempting to control two control-freak children while her decidedly un-control-freakish husband dodges flying objects.

Maybe it's just me, but I have a sneaking suspicion that I'm not alone. How do YOU get your kids to follow your lead without resorting to yelling/bribing/throwing your own tantrum on the floor? 
Julia said...

Marble jar for good like a charm. Do something good and follow directions..a small amount of marbles go into the jar. Get in trouble and not listen, marbles go out of the jar. When the jar is full, a reward is given. Might work..good luck and don't be so hard on yourself.

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