Liar, liar...

Depression is a liar.

It tells you that your life is hopeless. That you are a failure. It whispers that you are a bad mother and terrible wife. It screams that you don't deserve to live out your dreams, and that even if you were worthy, you aren't smart enough to make them happen anyhow. It sneakily, stealthily, consistently eats away at your joy until you wake up one day and find that you can't remember the last time that you were happy, or even how it feels to be so.

But these things are not true. Life can be hard. Storms come and destroy. Jobs change. Marriages face challenges. Kids test every ounce of our patience. We fall and fail time and time again. But there is still hope. There are still reasons to be thankful. There are things that remain beautiful in life.

When we fail, when we fall down (and, let's face it - we all fail and we all fall down at some point), depression whispers in our ear. It tells us that there's no use in getting up, in trying again. Better to just stay down on the ground where we belong. No one believes in you. No one really thinks you can do it. Things will never get better, so why even try?

Depression is a liar. Repeat this phrase three times. Daily. Tell your loved ones. Tell your friends. If you think you might be battling with depression, don't face this battle alone. Talk to your doctor. Talk to a therapist. You can even send me a message and I will do everything that I can to get you the help you need ( It is so easy to think that it's just you - that you're the only one who had ever felt this way. Or worse, to feel like you are a failure when you can't seem to snap out of it.

That's bullshit.

Depression tells you that you're not good enough. That you're crazy. That you're the only one who deals with this, and if you tell anyone about it they will think you are a loser. You are not. Depression is a liar. Don't believe it.

I say this with conviction because I know what it feels like to deal with anxiety and depression. For years, I espoused the "suck it up, buttercup" philosophy and attempted to shake my depression with food, work, exercise or a good drink. Anything to prevent me from actually facing the emotions that were driving me to question the value of my own life.

After years of struggle, with the help of an amazing therapist, a supportive family and antidepressants I finally understand and believe that depression is a liar. It is something that I have to deal with, but it does not define me. I won't pretend that I have it kicked and it never gets to me. Even with the medication I have my moments. But now, instead of falling into a deep hole of hopelessness (or burying my head in a tub of ice cream), I know that I need to slow down and be kind to myself. I sleep more. I try to exercise in the mornings. I check in with my therapist more often and do my best to identify what I am feeling rather than trying to run away from it.

Depression is a liar, but you are not alone. 
Southern Girl said...

Love the message

Anonymous said...

I too struggle with the delusions that I AM JUST NOT GOOD ENOUGH.....Thank you for being so open,helps to know we are not alone...others too feel this. last week i phoned a hot line,i am still here. Thankfully,some dont understand why it can be such a chore to even interest in food unless it is m&ms.Somedays are easier than others . Tonight I do not feel so alone.

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