Emergency Procedures

Nothing puts life back into perspective like a car accident or a sick child.

Let me explain.

The BadAssMama has been off of her A-game lately. Not because of mommy guilt, sleep deprivation or overexertion but due to an acute case of professional political bullshit. I won't bother going into detail, but suffice it to say that while an attack on my parenting skills may get me hot under the collar, attempted professional sabotage can make a girl come positively unglued.

If that weren't bad enough, my Wednesday was a virtual litany of Marshall's Law. Here's a peek at my day:

  • Dash to the train in the pouring rain to make an early meeting
  • Hit the platform in time to hear that all trains into and out of Manhattan are cancelled due to electrical problems
  • Race back to my car to drive into the city
  • Get rear-ended by a commercial truck roughly 1.5 minutes into my drive
  • Settle accident details, turn on news radio to get the latest traffic update
  • Hear that trains are now running into Manhattan again
  • Drive back to the train station
  • Rip hem of pants running to make next train
  • Run from subway to my office in time to make the delayed start of early client meeting
Despite the happy ending of making the meeting on time (apparently everyone had a bitch of a commute), my day continued to be colored by the aforementioned political bullshit. Truth be told, my fender bender may very well have been caused by my distracted thinking related to said bullshit. I made it through the day and looked forward to having dinner with my kids for the first time all week, putting them to bed and losing myself in a brilliant bottle of Riesling. 

And then I was reminded of what matters most.

I walked in the door to a note from Victor's teacher. It read that he complained of pain in his hands after nap. No sooner had I finished the last word than Victor began to moan that his hands were hurting again. As many of you know, Victor has a form of sickle cell anemia. While most days he is a happy, healthy little boy, he can occasionally have a "traffic jam" of deformed red blood cells in his veins from illness, injury or dehydration which can cause moderate to extreme pain. In children, these pain crises most often start in the small vessels of the hands or feet. 

We were able to control his pain and avoid the ER in the middle of the night with Motrin, then headed to the hematologist first thing in the morning. After a few gut wrenching hours, the doctors were able to get the pain under control with IV hydration and medication, and we were able to bring our once-again happy little Roo back home. 

But here's the rub - based upon the aforementioned professional drama, I spent more than a few moments worrying about attending a key meeting this afternoon rather than putting my entire focus on my son. In the end, I did the right thing (the ONLY thing, really) and focused on getting Victor healthy, but I am ashamed to say that I hesitated for more than a second based upon professional bullshit. 

I hate that it took a true emergency with my child to remind me of what really matters. In life - whether it be with family, friends or business associates - there will be petty drama. Don't let what matters least get in the way of what matters most. My career is important to me - it fulfills my need to achieve, satisfies my competitive streak and gives my a place to feel smart and accomplished on any given day (while motherhood typically makes me feel like a beaten down dishrag with no clue as to whether I'm building great young men or future serial therapy dwellers). 

My career is important, but it is not my life. Nor should it be the life of anyone who wishes to be truly successful. Career success takes drive, focus and dedication, but a 24-7 run on the career hamster wheel guarantees burnout and potential professional disaster. My family is my life and never again will I allow petty professional bullshit to cloud my focus on what matters most. 

Workout Wednesday with Jennifer Turner

The BadAssMama is all about daring to design your best life. Whether it's spending time with your family, maximizing your career or spending some quality me-time, I believe in making a commitment to create the life that YOU want. And as any busy woman knows, you can't be at your best if you're not feeling your best. And for that, you've got to MOVE. 

Thank goodness for Jennifer Turner and Mad Cool Fitness! Here's your weekly fix of badass fitness - in 10 minutes or less!

For more workouts, check out Jennifer's latest DVD

Makeup Mondays with D'angelo Thompson

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Beauty Reinventions
By D'angelo Thompson

The past few weeks clients/friends have been making appts for a beauty reinvention to milestones in their lives: turning 30,40, 50, new jobs or just a revamp.

My best advice is what your comfortable in push it, rev it up...with beauty now there are so many tricks with hair that is not damaging like wigs, organic coloring and hair care products( Hadiiya Barbel Crowns,hair colorist Marco Guglielmino at MarcoNYC.com and natural/organic  hair care products by YAROK). 

Beauty is very vast and being a woman you can go many directions , build your color options and take lessons to learn new tricks. The key is to search for strong pigments that can be found in :Cargo,Nars, Tom Ford, HOur Glass and of course Make Up For Ever.

D'angelo Thompson, make up, groomer, beauty educator, blogger  and author

Workout Wednesday with Jennifer Turner

Thanks to a good old fashioned case of jet lag, my boys have been waking up every morning in California at 5am. Good news is I've been able to get in a workout every morning during our family vacation.

Good thing for you, you won't need a 5am wake up call to fit in another 10 minute MAD COOL workout from my friend and fellow badass, Jennifer Turner of Mad Cool Fitness. Let's STEP AWAY FROM THAT CHICKEN WING! and get crackin'.

For more Mad Cool Fitness, you can buy Jennifer's latest DVD here.  

Makeup Monday with D'angelo Thompson

Beauty Has a Name
By D'angelo Thompson

When a person is in my makeup chair on set, I think of two things: How are they feeling? What are their best assets/features? I believe that everyone is beautiful. Just as we encourage our children, nephews and nieces, make sure that you acknowledge your beautiful strengths as well.

Beauty has a name and when you see her in the mirror bare-faced in the morning, smile at her!

D'angelo Thompson - makeup, groomer, beauty educator, blogger and author

Workout Wednesday with Jennifer Turner

The BadAssMama is all about living a balanced lifestyle. And there's nothing more important to a balanced life - especially for crazy working mothers - than getting our move on every day. That's why I'm so glad to call Jennifer Turner my friend!

Jennifer Turner is a fitness activator and founder of Mad Cool Fitness - an incredible lifestyle program designed to help you get fit and live your best life. Each Wednesday, we'll feature a 10 minute workout video from this badass sista to help you meet your fitness goals. Every little bit counts! 

And if you're hungry for more Mad Cool Fitness, you can buy Jennifer's latest DVD here

Now let's get moving!

The BadAssMama's Red Eye Flight Survival Guide


The BadAssMama is no fan of the overnight-cross-country-flight. But sometimes a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. So, here are some tips to help you survive the chaos of the red eye:

1) Join an airline club. Trust me, it's worth the cash

2) Take a shower in the airline club before your flight - helps you relax and get ready to nod off

3) Change from business chic to slouchy, elasticy goodness

4) Order a glass of wine and/or a chocolate chip cookie (see point 2b)

5) Get to your gate 45 minutes before boarding to beat the rush

6) Book a window seat so no one is stepping over you all night

7) Slap on a sleep mask and noise canceling headphones

8) Wake up on the East Coast!

Confessions of a BadAssMama - The Recharge Edition

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As much as a love a good spa day, nothing recharges The BadAssMama's batteries like a good old fashioned business trip.

Let me explain.

As many of you know, The BadAssMama is a multi-hyphenate. Wife-mother-executive-blogger-writer.   All around BadAss. But, as any of you with children also know, the title of "mother" can become all-encompassing at times. As much as we try to compartmentalize our lives - focusing on work while we're at work and home when we're at home - the "home" aspect often seems to find a way to creep into every other aspect of our lives. Whether we like it or not...

But, I have a little secret. Want to know what it is? It's called the business trip. Sound crazy? Well, let me tell you - your basic business trip covers just about all the bases when it comes to providing the busy working mom with a little bit of cushion and release from the craziness of everyday life:

  • Someone else does all of the cooking and cleaning
  • You can leave the bed unmade each morning without feeling guilty
  • You are virtually guaranteed an uninterrupted night of sleep
  • You can hit the gym for a full workout, guilt-free
  • If a child is misbehaving/crying/falling out on the plane, you can crank up your iPod or pop on your noise canceling headphones
  • Nine times out of ten there are liquor and adult-friendly restaurants involved
While all of these things are incredible, the single most satisfying element of a business trip for me is the sense of accomplishment. While I'm on the road, I experience a singular sense of focus and mastery of my job that I can never quite capture back at the office. Somehow, my level of career focus increases in direct proportion to my distance in miles from my children. Now, don't get me wrong, I do my thing at work on a day-to-day basis, but on business trips I can take my badassery to a whole different level. 

True. The travel grind can be hard. There are early wake up calls, day long meetings, changing time zones and the absence of the comforts of home. But when you approach a business trip in the right way, you can come home just as recharged, refreshed and rejuvenated as a week away at the spa. 

Maybe it's just me, but I love business trips...

Makeup Mondays with D'angelo Thompson


Beauty Shock Treatment
By D'angelo Thompson

We peel, laser, shock and pull our faces to look young or younger, no judgement but the key is to start the process from the inside out. I have seen radical changes in skin from green  or fruit/vegetable juicing. 

I think atleast three to four times a year we should do a detox and you will see amazing results in hydration and firmness of skin!

It's like turning back the clock and much cheaper!

D'angelo Thompson, make up, groomer, beauty educator, blogger  and author


Six years ago, I almost died.

At the end of a "standard" 30 week pregnancy check up, I was rushed to NYU Langone Medical Center with a  blood pressure reading so high that I could have stroked out at any moment. After nearly 2 weeks of IV fluid, ultrasounds, fetal monitoring and a near constant magnesium-induced stupor, I delivered a tiny baby boy via emergency c-section.

He was born at 32 weeks weighing 2 pounds, 13 ounces. I saw him for just a moment after the delivery then fell into a blood pressure induced haze for roughly 3 days. The next time I saw my baby boy, he was a tiny but fierce little thing, constantly breaking out of his swaddling in the incubator of the NICU.

Angel's first few weeks of life were marked by anxiety and constant monitoring. When would he get to come home? Was he gaining enough weight? Would he catch a deadly infection in the hospital? Would there be any lingering impact from his prematurity? Would our lives ever be normal again?

Well, six years later I can tell you that he came home - happy and healthy after 35 days in the NICU. While we had one scare in the hospital, he made it out with no infections or medical interventions needed. And while there are no lingering effects from his prematurity, our lives were definitely never the same again.

Angel has brought more joy, wonder, frustration and ferocity to my life than I ever imagined possible. He is full of life - running head-long into each new challenge with his own unique blend of curiosity and passion.

Happy birthday, Angel. Mommy loves you.

Top 10 Ways to Avoid a Mama Meltdown

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It happens to the best of us. We just have to get out the door, finish a load of laundry, send one last email or catch our breath for one second when our kids decide that this is the perfect time to freak the F out. So what's a mama to do? For most of us (The BadAssMama included), the typical answer is to match their freakout with a mama meltdown of our own. But, nine times out of ten this only serves to escalate the situation. So, what's a mama to do? Here are a few suggestions:

10. Lock yourself in the bathroom with your favorite magazine. Tell the kids "I can't hear you!" When they bang on the door

9. Break out into song. Ideally accompanied by full choreography

8. Refuse to respond in anything above a whisper. In a language that they don't understand

7. Pray. Loudly. For the strength to deal with your crazy ass children

6. Start mumbling something about fishsticks as you slowly back out of the room 

5. Transform into the Tickle Monster and take your frustrations out in a more loving, yet equally punishing way

4. Remind your children that you love them even when they're not being good listeners. Repeat until you actually believe it

3. Imagine yourself on a warm sandy beach with a fruity drink in one hand and a good book in the other. A beach with no children...

2. Put on your coat and say goodbye as you open the front door (nothing wrong with a little motivation)

1. When all else fails, there's always wine